2025-07-20

Stats:
Weight: 283.5lb
Debt: -$8,460.67

Been kind of shit. Stopped taking meds and got kind of manic. Spent a shit ton of money. I hate being bipolar :((( Back on my meds. Spent like $200 on makeup (bad), $400 Clothes, $600 furniture (ok). I have been needing to get a new desk. My current one is too tall and makes my wrists hurts. Overall, feeling kind of shit. But started taking my meds so should be better. In fairness I had a lot of heavy emotional shit going on… basically like I thought I was gay and into my friend. But then I realized I’m not actually into women :( Which kind of sucks because I look very gay. I have a shaved head and look gay. So the clothes and makeup were kind of like about recognizing and affirming my identity as like a straight woman. I want to get out of debt so bad dude. Like I hate being in debt. It sucks. I’m tired of paying interest. I’ve also been pushing myself very hard physically. Like I was working out to deal with my heavy emotions. Which while healthy, I definitely overdid. My strava score went from like 20 to like 57 :) so like more than doubled my activity so I’ve just been trying to limit my activity. Also stopped dog sitting. So I have more free time.

Also bought many retro dresses. So I’m excited to explore that. Also excited to not date for a while. Staying off the apps like Grindr and Lex.